Dear Mom: It’s Been a Year

Dear Mom,

It has been a year.  It has certainly been a year.

It’s been a year since I heard you voice.  It’s been a year since I saw your face.  It’s been a year since I hugged you, and laughed with you, and got to hold your hand.  

It’s been a year filled with emotions … both happy and sad, angry and appreciative, joyful and sorrowful.  I miss you.  I miss you in ways I didn’t know I could miss someone.  I miss you for reasons I can’t even put into words.

You were the best.  Your love and your heart are what I miss most.  Your smile and your voice are what I miss most.  Your hugs and your wisdom are what I miss the most.  Simply having you near me, and knowing you were near, is what I miss the most.

Our memories together are my greatest treasures.  Thank you for creating them with me.  Thank you for living a life that was full of amazing moments.  Those moments are what I stir up in my mind and heart when I need you and want you back.  Those special times that were just you and me, and us … those are the most beautiful things you left behind.  

Your life is still making a difference.  I want you to know that, even though you hopefully already know that.  Your words and your wisdom are still here.  Your love and your faith are still here … even though you are gone.  

But here’s the thing … you are not really gone.  You’ve just shifted.  You’ve shifted into the most glorious existence … THE existence we will one day experience when we are reunited in Heaven.  God has given us the greatest gift … His love, and life everlasting in His presence.  There is nothing greater.

As I sit here and wish you were sitting right next to me, so I could rest my head on your shoulder, and tell you I love you, I know that deep down … really deep down … I want you to be exactly where you are.  You are with our ever-loving Father.

For you, it’s been a year of worship and praise, dancing and singing, joy and complete peace.  It has been a year of being completely healed and whole and set free.  For you, it has been a year of experiencing God’s presence like we will never know here on Earth.  Of that, I am a little envious.  :)

So, on this one year anniversary of your entrance into Heaven, I want you to know that I still love you more than ever, miss you more than ever, and am so thankful I will see you again someday.  We can worship together, and it will be magnificent.

Thank you for still being here with me, though.  I feel your presence in so many wonderful ways.  The butterflies and the birds, the sunsets and the seasons … they are all reminders of how blessed I am to be your daughter.  I still hear your heartfelt words about love and life and faith, and for that I am grateful.

It has been a year … one of the toughest, but I thank God for healing my heart, day by day.  It’s not an easy journey, and it is not a quick one, either.  It’s a lifelong process of seeking Him … our Comforter.

So, Mom, know that I love you more than words can express, and I pray God allows us to have more beautiful moments together this year.  You are so precious to me.  

I’ll love you forever, like you for always,

Your Daughter

 

 

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